Help Your Parents Age Wisely

By: Nicole Shalit

Today, there are more than fifty million people who care for a ill or aging family member. Caring for your aging parents can be stressful on many parts of your life. It will affect you emotionally, fanatically, medically, and legally. Whether you are using in home or medical care, you are undoubtedly concerned about memory loss and possible dementia or Alzheimer’s disease. Here are a few steps to take now and in the future regarding your parent’s health.

1. Start talking about this issue. Have conversations with your parents about the different aspects of this decision and how they could benefit from it. Ask them what they would like, or what they feel they need.

2. Get to planning. Plan everything out, and make sure every legal aspect is covered. Documents such as the power of attorney should be filled out and signed, and a living will should be part of your estate planning, along with a will or trust.

3. Consolidate Medical Information. Start a health file with copies of all their medical tests, doctors contact information, and medicine records including medicines that did not work. This can be kept in a file, binder, or on your computer.

4. Practice Prevention: Know your family and personal medical history and risks and practice prevention.

5. Evaluate Financial Alternatives, and review your financial situation with a professional. This could help you look at the comprehensive picture and anticipate how you can finance long-term care needs. Consider long-term care insurance as part of your total insurance and financial plan.

6. Discuss Funerals and consider funeral planning. Either write down your wishes and letting loved ones know what you want, or purchasing a pre need burial contract. Investigate possible options and decide what is best for you, but at least provide loved ones some guidance about what you would want so they don’t have the added stress when they are grieving.

7. If your parents are living at your house, find anything that could be a possible threat to their health or safety and “elder proof it”. This is much like “child proofing”. Some examples of potential hazards include medication management systems (from simple pill boxes to electronic reminder systems), emergency response systems, grab bars and mobility devices, and meal delivery services.

8. Have a family discussion regarding care giving duties and plans for your parents care. Schedule regular meetings, whether it be dinner or coffee, to ensure continuity. Consider using a professional to facilitate, especially when there are conflicts.

9. Talk to others who have been through similar situations. A support group or online network may be helpful, reading and gathering information may help you as well.

10. Keep the Peace: Express your specific concerns with your loved one and work toward solutions together. Engage a professional or other family members when your loved one is resistant.